Do you think gifting your book would help with reconciliation?

  • December 29, 2021

Hi Fern –

I so so loved your book! Well done to your brother and you for articulating the series of events/emotions that led to your estrangement. So comforting. I’m experiencing the early days of sibling estrangement with my sister.

I’m wondering, if I should gift her your book? Perhaps, she’ll read it and come running with open arms

… On the flipside it will be another attempt met with disregard and defensiveness. What are your thoughts about the estranged using your book to guide reconciliation. Has anyone done it successfully? 

2 thoughts on “Do you think gifting your book would help with reconciliation?”

  1. Fern Schumer Chapman

    Thank you for your kind words and excellent question. I’d love to hear from those who have used the book as a gift to see if it aided in reconciliation.

    I did hear from one angry recipient who did not appreciate the gift. She felt it was manipulative of the estranged sibling to present the book to her without a note or even a card indicating who sent the gift. However, others have found that the book facilitated a deeper conversation and understanding about reconciliation.

    If you should decide to use the book as a gift, I think it’s important to include a note that states your deep desire to re-establish your relationship with your sister.

    What do readers think?

  2. Fern Schumer Chapman

    I’ve been thinking about your question, and I’m wondering if the best approach might be to write your estranged sister a letter expressing your desire to reconnect, asking if she is open to reconciliation, and offering her a book that might help both of you as you redefine your relationship.

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